While I sit at my desk watching the leaves wiggle as the wind blows, I think of how renewal is upon us.

My Spirit whispering to me “it’s time” like the gusts of wind making the leaves dance.

It’s been a while… a little too long maybe… but like the seasons we re-emerge.

After completing my 100 week Mental Health series I took a break from writing.

I felt like I had to give people the chance to catch up & really grasp what I was speaking on throughout the series.

It was raw, it was deep, it was encouraging, but sometimes it was also sad, harsh, & not always what you wanted to hear but needed to.

It was a mirror reflecting back at you, showing you those sides of yourself you may tend to avoid because it’s easier to ignore the shadows than to walk hand-in-hand with it towards the light.

Being avoidant may have worked for a while but at what point do you strip yourself of the masks you wear?

Some people will go through life changing masks but the series had become a self-care club for those who were ready to face themselves.

At the end of the series, I felt I leveled up & I was no longer in a space where I was trying to heal from.

I then was in a space of just being, feeling so relieved of freeing my heart space from a lot of the traumas discussed.

I felt in many ways that I finally set myself free.

During my break from writing, I dived into other creative & expressive outlets.

I shared my guidance by way of oracle readings.

I went from curating playlists for MML Radio to creating a segment with my Wife called “Intent Talk”, a safe space where we intentionally discussed a range of different topics & how to navigate them.

To me it felt like an extension of the Mental Health Monday series but this time it was verbalized & it wasn’t just me doing the talking.

We shared perspectives & ideas, we curated playlists together to match the topics of discussion.

We answered questions & gave advice from our personal experiences.

We had decided coming into 2024 that S2 of Intent Talk will be just one episode a month.

When March started we never got to air the episode we had planned because life did what it always does, LIFED.

My Wife lost her mom & that rocked me!

As an empath you feel other’s emotions & I’ve learned to distinguish when someone’s energy/ emotions rub off on me in comparison to my own, but this was different… it amplified because it’s not just any person, it’s my soulmate experiencing this.

Navigating this grief hasn’t been easy.

Grief is the trickiest… it comes in humongous waves that can easily wash you out & other times, waves that simply allow you to float.

The tricky part is… both can drown you & nobody talks about how you cling for dear life to the little life raft of hope that’s given.

But…

Hope grows when your faith is rooted in the Lord.

Faith is present when your beliefs are beyond the physical.

Peace & comfort lie in the confirmations given that your angels are always near.

Although bittersweet, you’re relieved to still communicate because even in death a relationship doesn’t end… it transcends.

During this transformative time, we still found things to be joyous about.

We decided to celebrate our love & got married on our anniversary.

[Yes yall, your girl is a whole ass Wife! *screams* Remember The Single Lady?! HAHAHA (IYKYK) Your girl has come a LOOOOOOOOOOONG way!]

Anyways…

In September grief struck again, this time I was faced with the decision of having to put my 12 year old dog down.

It was a moment I had been dreading while also mentally trying to prepare myself for.

The loss of a soul pet is gut wrenching, especially when you’ve had them from a puppy.

8 months later, & I still cry about him.

He’s everywhere though… I remind myself of that every time he sends me his little signs.

For example, whenever I cooked he would always look for me to drop something, like dogs do.

Now that he’s gone there’s times where if I drop something I feel that’s him letting me know he’s right there.

The first time I had experienced this was our first Thanksgiving dinner without him, a little bit of everything I made fell that day.

The other day I was eating Cheerios, something that I would always give him, & one fell, I giggled cause as I was pouring them into my cup to eat dry, I was thinking of him, I bend down to pick it up & it happened to be heart shaped.

The synchronicities are never coincidental.

Sometimes they’re messages & sometimes they’re warnings but either way they’re real.

While navigating loss & happiness simultaneously, I’ve also been working.

As we know, I started the Mental Health Monday series in May of 2021 to highlight the fact that May is Mental Health Awareness month.

If you’re reading this still, then you can see why I will continue to advocate for Mental Health awareness & care.

We all experience grief, loss, & hardship, that’s the unfortunate guarantee in life.

But…

What I learned is how we prevail & continue forward is the way through.

It’s not easy, it takes courage to even recalibrate, but with grace there’s nothing that can’t be done.

While navigating grief & loss I leaned into learning something new.

Teaching myself by trial & error, I decided to start screen-printing on my own.

For the past decade of creating merchandise, I had a printing team helping me bring my visions to life.

This time around, I wanted to take on the challenge of doing this task so I purchased everything I would need to start.

I then fell victim to procrastination, finding everything else to do but what had actually been calling me.

When I got real about the procrastination, I had a very serious talk with myself.

I was like:

“What the fuck are you waiting for?”

“Who else is going to do it?”

“God gave YOU the vision, you must execute it!”

“Why are you being so scary?!”

“20something year old you would do this with her eyes closed.”

“Think BIG bitch, think BIG!”

I was bullying myself because I needed to hear those things directly from me to me.

I also bullied myself into working out everyday these past couple of months & that’s now become a habit I’m proud of.

I’ve learned that the constant quest of bettering yourself comes with intense growing pains.

While I’ve been extremely open about my life throughout the years, I found myself in a space where I didn’t feel like sharing anything.

With internet visibility there’s this layer of performance & perfection, & I felt the need to opt out & tune into self.

I’ve been in the lab trying to perfect this new skill of mine.

I’ve been running from doing this because my need for perfection has been overwhelming & talked me out of doing it, sharing it, & even selling it.

With the said, I’m here to announce MML™️ latest drop…

This collection is very precious to me because it took me a while to not only create it but to be in a space to share it.

Compared to my other collections, I’d describe this one as raw.

While sourcing materials, I searched for the best faded & oversized heavy cotton tees I could find for this drop.

It features 9 variations of items, some items are 1 of 1, making it not only raw but rare.

Since I started designing a decade ago, you know I’ve always done limited drops – the point of that was to only have a select few to get their hands on my work, making it exclusive to those who supported me & I kept that component in mind for this release.

With all I’ve shared above, you know life has been lifing & when choosing the color variations for this drop that played a major part.

Comfort & simplicity are major factors for me when creating & lately I’ve been inspired by the fadedness in vintage tees.

The main colors I chose to work with are:

– Ash

– Dust

– Coffee

– Amethyst

– Sage

[Ash is a faded black, Dust is a faded grey, Coffee is a faded brown, Amethyst is a faded purple, Sage is a faded green.]

The significance of these colors is that black can be seen as powerful while also representing mourning.

Grey is often associated with neutrality & calmness while also representing sadness.

Brown is often associated with dependability & reliability because of its grounded nature but it can also represent isolation.

Purple is often associated with royalty & nobility because of its rich nature but it also represents magic being the link between both the spiritual & physical worlds.

Green is often associated with growth & renewal but can also represent decay.

I chose these colors intentionally because they reflect both sides of the spectrum, & you certainly can’t have one without the other.

Some of the 1 of 1 items include an ombré tie-dye tote bag, a coffee color dip-dye tote bag to create a distorted paper bag effect, as well as a tie-dye hoodie.

All items have been screen-printed & dyed in-house.

All woven MML™️ tags were hand-sewn.

I’m calling this drop the Imperfection Collection because each item has organic fading throughout, screen-prints with a slight fade, & some distortion in each garment making them truly raw & unique.

The title of this collection also came about mainly because my imperfections almost stopped me from a calling God has given me.

What I thought was a setback was God preparing the stage.

Without navigating this grief, how could I have made it here?

The testimony was meant to be shared so people can better understand.

The reality is… life will never be perfect, its full of ups & downs, highs & lows, & us humans experience it that way as well.

Self-reflections are the hardest, that’s why people often avoid them but this time… I looked self right in the eye.

I’m doing it scared & nervous but regardless of the outcome, I did it!

In honor of Mental Health Awareness month, I give to you all the Imperfection Collection.

Click here to SHOP NOW!

– MML