Mental Health Monday – Week 24

This week I’d like to discuss expectations.

We’ve all felt entitled enough to have them at some point or another but here’s why we shouldn’t:

Placing expectations on people or things usually lead to disappointment.

People don’t nor won’t always do or say the things we’d like.

Things may not always go as expected either.

Often times people give advice, love, gifts, or a helping hand with the expectations that the person receiving will reciprocate those same offerings back.

Some people are raised seeing a transactional type of giving & later in life adopt those very same mentalities & behaviors. Feeling a sense of entitlement & resentment when those offerings aren’t reciprocated.

Growing up, my Grandmother Nancy always told me “it’s better to give than to receive”.

When I was younger I never really understood that saying the way I do now. I started to see what it was that she meant.

I’ve seen people give with the impurest intentions.

I’ve witnessed people give just to throw it back in the persons face.

I’ve watched people help others just to talk about what they’ve done for them.

It’s ugly & the intentions behind that type of giving are narcissistically driven.

When you give anything to anyone, don’t keep track of it.

Don’t hold a distorted perspective that keeps you from doing something to help others because nobody did it for you.

Don’t hold back the gift of giving because you’ve been deprived of genuine generosity.

Full disclaimer, I’m not saying to overextended yourself for any & everyone.

I’m also not saying to give without boundaries or to let people take advantage of you.

I think it’s important I clarify that because often times you’ll come across people who expect your energy, time, & efforts with such entitlement but reciprocate nothing.

Stay away from those kinds of people because they’re the ones who will drain you of everything you have to offer.

What I am saying is not to give with an expectation attached.

I’m also saying not to become bitter over all the good you’ve done for others without receiving anything in return.

Intentions are important when giving.

If you do something for someone with the best intentions, I believe that energy will return back to you ten fold in a time of need. Maybe not from the person you’ve helped, but in an unexpected way that help or gift will make its way back to you.

If you give out of obligation or impure intentions, chances are what you’re giving is what you’ll receive back.

Keep in mind that helping people in any capacity is the work of The Lord, whether you’re religious or not.

We are all here to help each other in some way, whether it’s through teaching a lesson or lending a helping hand, that’s just how the wheel turns.

The universe is receptive to those who willingly give but don’t give expecting something in return.

I think people have grown to think that the amount they give equates to the amount of love measured & that’s not how love should ever be measured.

Giving doesn’t need to be boasted upon, it doesn’t need to be “posted” for it to be considered real.

Like love, giving should always come freely from the heart.


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