This week I’d like to discuss abandonment issues.
Abandonment issues can be caused by several different things – an absent parent, experiencing loss, change within your environment.
When these scenarios take place they tend to leave behind painful memories which cause us to react from an anxious attachment style.
This attachment styles tends to showcase low self-esteem, excessive neediness, & major anxiety within a person.
Abandonment issues can create toxic dynamics within all kinds of relationships.
When someone is seeking approval & acceptance from a parent all their life, it usually results in searching for that same acceptance within a romantic partner later on down the line.
The need to be seen, felt, & heard deepens as their subconscious seeks approval.
Patterns of abuses may even become “normal” as the brain starts to accept & recognize this form of numbing itself.
I think people who suffer from deep abandonment issues can recover from the emptiness they feel.
Trying to fill these voids with people, places, or things is never the answer.
To recover from deep abandonment wounds, I think it’s important to recognize how attachment styles can evolve when you’re willing to do the necessary work that it takes to truly heal.
When people take time to innerstand their traumas & start to recognize specific patterns, a change can be made.
Working on your self-esteem & how you feel internally despite said issues is how you’ll free yourself.
It’s no easy task, but it’s one that’s worth the effort.
Abandonment issues are hard to cope with but with the proper support they can become manageable & transmutable.
I think the goal to healing our issues isn’t to act like they don’t exist, but to instead accept & embrace them.
In no way am I saying to accept or embrace any kind of abuse, as abandonment can arise differently for everyone.
What I am saying is to accept & embrace the challenges given to you because the things we go through are tailored specifically for us to get through.
Our progress doesn’t need to be on display for others, we can honor ourselves when we start recognizing & celebrating ourselves in the moment rather than dwelling on who abandoned us.
Allowing your abandonment issues to cause derailment is a choice & ignoring it is suppression.
⁃ MML
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